Sunday, September 24, 2006


"Jab mein chotta baccha tha
Badi shararat karta tha
Meri shararat pakdi jaatiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Tab roshan hota tha Bajaj"
Well I'm quoting this jingle for 2 reasons:
1> to remind u of the beating that you used to get from your mom after getting a pasting from that smelly brat in your colony
2> to remind you of much simpler times...before the invasion of internet and cable tv in your life...when Ruffles and Mcdonald's were never heard of...when the "Goldspot factory" used to actually make "Goldspot"...when returning NRIs used to get cans of coke n fanta as gifts (cheap bastards) and when the coolest toy you owned was that stupid brick game.
So guys, I'm taking y'all on a trip down the memory lane as I try to recollect some of the stuff that we watched on TV (doordarshan who??) ate, drank n the cool toys we played I go...

Stuff Lost In Time 1 : The Giant Robot
Remember the giagantic papier mache guy??Probably the coolest superhero that we had when we grew up watching Doordarshan. This show was about a kickass dumb flying robot which was controlled by a Japanese kid called Johny Sokko.Certainly the best Japanese imports on the Indian television and can beat all the current detergent serials hands down as far as good entertainment is concerned.The story went something like this...there is this evil emperor who owns a robot which is hidden on some island. Our hero, Johny Sokko is a member of a super cool peace keeping orgarnisation called the UNICORN whose plane crashes one day on this island. Somehow he manages to get hold of this cool watch which doubles up as a voice command remote control thingy which controls the robot. Now since Sokko is the first dude to speak into that watch, the dumbass robot obeys him only. Now obviously the emperor is pissed off and in every episode he makes a new robot n sends it to destroy our Giant Robot. Now our kid Sokko has to make the Giant Robot kick the evil robot's ass by commanding the robot to move his limbs,punch, kick, use lasers coming out of his eyes, fire missiles from his fingers and other cool shit like that. Our Giant Robot doesn't have an iota of AI (remember Shakey the robot from AI sem 7 :P ??) and has to obey master Sokko and save himself and also the mankind.
The show lacked any sort of 3D animation and most of the fight scenes seemed to be cut-pasted from earlier episodes. The scenes in which the kids flew using their jet packs were shot by making the kids raise their hands in the air,move the camera horizontally and edit off their bodies below their torso. But watever, it was the coolest thing on TV...every evening 5:30-6 we used to take a break from cricket and watch the robot kick some evil ass. I remember being gutted the day they took it off the air...I also remember throwing a tantrum for a giant robot toy and asking my dad where the hell the remote was when he got me a small car which doubled up as a robot....Giant robot...YOU ROCK!!!

Stuff lost in time 2: He-man and the masters of the universe

The most beloved of the super hero community. This was a story about a certain prince Adam and his kingdom's fight against the evil lord Skeletor. Our prince Adam was blessed by the sorceress of castle Grayskull and was given a sword which gave him super powers. The other characters included his dad King Randor,his meek catlike thingy Cringor, Man-at-arms, Orko (whatever he/she/it was) and my favourite-Teela. Teela was probably our first introduction to a hot chick n was probably the hotting thing on Doordarshan...uh she might still be the hottest chick on Doordarshan. Anyway every episode had our quintessentially evil lord creating some problem and our super-hero drawing out his sword to become He Man. My favourite part was the metamorphosis of Adam to He Man and Cringor to Battle Cat. It went something like this...First our hero would take out the sword and raise it high...then suddenly out of nowhere you would see a castle...then the background music would start..."Ta tata tatatatata tatatatata ta ta...HE MAN!!"...then Adam would scream,"I HAVE THE POWERS!!!" and then he would get converted into He Man and all the ass kicking would start. Every episode ended with one of the characters analyzing the episode n teaching the kids about the lessons to be learnt.

Stuff lost in time 3: Fusen gum

Absolutely the tastiest bubble gum of them was so freaking soft. Imagine someone swapping Alex Ferguson's Spearmint with Fusen Gum...the guy would totally lose it. Picture Fergie calling up Rooney for some instructions..."Roon i want you to chase down the defen....umm fuck!! this chewing gum is so soft...fuck the freakin try this gum" (btw Liverpool rocks..."You'll Never Walk Alone" :P) was that soft.All kids I knew learnt to blow a bubble with Fusen because it was so soft that it would easily slide over the tongue. The best part was that it came with a tattoo. It was damn simple to use...all you had to do was apply water to your hand and stick the tattoo on it besides having a non hairy hand. I tried really hard but never got the pink and blue tattoo right. Anyway, wat else do you expect from a 1 Re. gum??

Stuff lost in time 4: Pepsi cola
Well not exactly a cocktail of two soft drinks. This was a cheap orange juice which was frozen and packaged in slim plastic bags.All you had to do was make a small hole in the bag and suck on it. It was very yummy and also the root cause of intestinal diseases in kids. My adventures with pepsi cola ended the day my mom was convinced that my jaundice and other tummy problems not worth mentioning had originated from this small seemingly harmless drink.

Stuff lost in time 5: Peppy
If you can't eat just one pack of Ruffles then probably you wouldn't stop eating Peppy. This was a tomato flavoured wheel like stuff which you could really savour. I mean you could try eating the outer ring and show off a star of the remaining sticks, or you could put one in your mouth n roll it on your tongue...never had so much fun eating chips (gee...i love my food, don't I??)

Stuff lost in time 6: The VCR
Acronym for Video Cassette Recorder. It can now be found in some pre-historic display section in museums. Owning a VCR made you the coolest kid around simply because then it was assumed by other kids that you had an awesome collection of Tom & Jerry and Droopy. It was owning an X Box 360. The most annoying part of this device was its stupid head which required constant cleaning else your video would have some annoying distortions. I still have a couple of Tom and Jerry tapes. If any noble soul can lend me a VCR please mail me

Well I could go on and on about more stuff from the past but I guess my purpose here is served.I'll let Orko give the finishing touches.
"Well kids, today we saw how Abhi gets high after a quart of Old Monk.Neway,what he wanted to do was to remind you of the days when having fun was not about clubbing or owning an I-Pod or spending hours chatting on cell phones or the internet. There was a lot of fun in the simplest of things that we saw and did. Its always something special to go down that memory lane....Till next time....Adios!!"


mairaj zindran said...

Seriously, those were the days. The innocence is just not there these days.

Anonymous said...

Hey Aby Baby!

Thanks for taking us (dragging us) down the memory lane.
I miss the pepsi colas.


neverknown said...

Come on, Giant Robot :)

Cuckoo said...

Going thru your prev posts. This one is real good, enjoyed it.. taking us down the memory lane.

Hmmm. those were the days... of Peppy, VCR and Fusen gums.